D: HAH. Fat fucking chance. You shop better than anyone. That would be like me saying, “I’m becoming vegan”.
A Lady: Nono, for serious. I'm not going to buy – wait, okay – I'm not going to buy anything ONLINE for a year. That should keep me in check.
D: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
A Lady: What?
D: This will never happen, L.
A Lady: Dude! I am so serious!
D: The road to hell, etc.
A Lady: That's it. C'est tout.
…
Okay, fine, not a year. Until the December sales.
D: I give it three months.
A Lady: Nono, December sales. Because that's how I divide my year: retail clearance calendars. The summer sales are just starting. I'm on hiatus until post-christmas.
D: December is a stretch goal, but it's a goal.
A Lady: Goals: I has them.
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